21 Things to Stop
So Your Twentysomething Will Start
Part I: More Coach, Less Concierge
I’m keeping it simple this week with a checklist. It’s a list of things twentysomethings should start doing by 25–and should master by 30–which means it’s also a list of things parents should stop doing for their kids. You know, “when you stop, they start.”
That said, in no way do I assume that all parents are doing everything for their kids or that you as a reader are a so-called “helicopter parent.” In fact, anytime a sentence starts with “these kids” or “this generation” or “parents today,” I stop listening. Judgmental generalizations turn me off.
If you’re doing the below items for your twentysomething, it’s probably for one of three good reasons.
Because they need it–which means now is a good time to start teaching them how to do things for themselves. Don’t do for, do with.
Because they used to need it–and you might not have noticed they may not need it anymore.
Because you enjoy it–so please make sure your desire to parent isn’t getting in the way of your kid growing up.
As the parent of a twentysomething, think of yourself as less of a concierge and more of a coach. When it comes to the following items, don’t do, teach: